Good Vibrations sent me the Flora to review a long, long time ago. I kept putting it off for various reasons but the most relevant to this review was that it is so underwhelming. I mean, this thing is minuscule (says my gaping vagina). It didn’t do it at all for me, although I suppose […]
REVIEW: RHINO by TRAZ
I was sooo excited when Traz contacted me to review their new products: the Rhino sleeves. I don’t have a penis to play with but I sure did have a shitton of underwhelming vibes/dildos that needed some help so I happily obliged. With or without a real dick to play with, you’ll find a use […]
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REVIEW: GREEDY GIRL RABBIT VIBRATOR
~or~ Yes, please This 50 Shades Greedy Girl Rechargeable Rabbit Vibrator is just as fucking awesome (except a little more) as the Oooh Rabbit Vibrator Lovehoney sent me when I first started reviewing for them. Although this Rabbit vibe doesn’t do a fun, twirly dance (dear lord–for the life of me I cannot spell the word that describes […]
REVIEW: Divine Interventions, or, A Cautionary Tail
So, a few weeks ago I contacted Divine Interventions to request a review copy of one of their toy, either the Jackhammer Jesus or God’s Immaculate Rod to use in my upcoming “Unusual Sex Toys” series. The owner was kind enough to send me one of each of those toys. Here’s where things start to […]
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REVIEW: CRACKERS by BAD DRAGON
~or~ My First Dragon Dick! Never before have I experience a cock as large as Crackers’ the Bad Dragon dildo. When I was corresponding with the Bad Dragon rep he advised me to go with a “small” rather than a “mini” Dragon because my body can learn to accommodate the small where I may outgrow the […]
REVIEW: MINI RIPPLER
My reaction? 8/10 for size, depth and texture Fucking nothing for that bullet I used to think I was not a fan texture. That was, until I tried the Mini Rippler. I’m no size queen, as you’ve heard me say before, but I thought I would be disappointed with the size difference between the Mini […]
REVIEW: MUSTANG
Rating: 4/5 Overall quality: Wonderful Sound: That’s a stupid thing to ask. It’s a non-vibrating dildo. GOSH. Aesthetics: Looks freakishly like a real, uncircumcised penis. Delivers what’s promised: Sure it does. It’s important to note that because it’s squishy it’s not going to feel as large as the more solid silicone dildos. tl;d(wanna)r? Vixskin Mustang […]
REVIEW: LOVEHONEY GLASS DILDO
~or~ So, that’s what glass feels like inside of me! Edit: Since I reviewed this toy almost 7 years ago, things have changed. Now, this toy is no longer in production but you can buy a similar glass dildo here. The Lovehoney Ribbed Sensual Glass Dildo is the first glass toy to grace my nether […]
REVIEW: BULLSEYE
Bullseye by Pleasure Works may be the first toy that has really hit my g-spot in the perfect place. Usually, in order to feel it I need the g-spot toy to be dramatically curved or I need to use a scooping motion. Not with Bullseye. All I had to do was thrust and it hit the […]
REVIEW: CAPTAIN
Wow. So, turns out 1 7/8” is actually pretty girthy. I decided to go to Good Vibrations (the folks who sent me this beauty in exchange for an honest review) to touch the Captain to see what I was getting into. Oh boy. After not having had sex with a real penis for over […]